My truth. My life.

The worst pick up line


“Hey babe, whatch say you slide on ova here and let me doctor up yo lips wit some good ole fashion suga.”

“Excuse me?”

“Ya heard me, sweet thang.”

“Well then, if you will excuse me.  I need another drink.”


Im not sure why but when I saw the prompt this popped into my head.  I know it’s silly, but I had to share!

For Trifecta


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76 thoughts on “The worst pick up line

  1. A former of co-worker of mine once told me a guy tried to pick her up with the line, “Girl you look so good, I could sop you up with a biscuit.”

    I’m pretty sure it’s the same guy in your story! 🙂

  2. You realize that her last line is only encouragement for the guy…

  3. I hope that’s not a line you’ve ever heard. Too funny.

  4. Bahahahahahaha! Sure doesn’t sound like a drunk Irishman! Probably a line more like: “Coom dun me way, sweet lass. I wanna lick your… glass.”

  5. I know some places where that would probably work.

  6. haaahaaa!!! this is a winner for me!!! ^^ (your writing, not the guy’s pick-up line)

  7. Draug419 on said:

    This is a great laugh! If someone tried that corny line on me, I’d probably gag xD

  8. Hilarious! I hope you can purge it from your head now that it’s written down.

  9. Hahaha! This is great. What a slime ball 🙂

  10. Ready for St. Paddy’s Day a wee bit early…

  11. This was funny. Very good use of the word!!

  12. Well done Bo! I love how just a visual on a word can bring about such amazing different views 🙂

  13. love how you’ve brought out the atmosphere by spelling out the words differently. great job, deana

  14. I do feel a tad sorry for the fellas… They are generally the ones to ‘break the ice’ and, poor things they really can find it hard…. Yeah sure; some are slime balls but heck; some are just nice guys with a big fat tongue that doesn’t always flatter them..! 😉
    Loved this one, Deana… 🙂

  15. Oh I’ve used worse!

  16. thevixenfiction on said:

    Great.. Have heard a few in my time…xx

  17. everybody needs a little silly! thanks for sharing the giggle! Irish I knew if the other drank loosened her lips (or not)! lol

  18. You know what they say… drink till they look good!

  19. oh, Deana! 🙂 Good ole Irish gals that we are. 🙂 love!

  20. Great idea for the prompt. Love how you created the sleazy voice. I’d love to read what comes next. 😉

  21. Ewww! Hahaha! I would totally move to the other end of the bar. lol

  22. Oh ,oh!That one is a goner!Lol!Though I have never been to a bar or seen /heard such things in real life but I do know that creeps of every kind exist & they get worse when drunk!Enjoyed the way you crafted the scene Deana-I could almost hear the slur & her look of indignation ;-)Great job!

  23. Love that voice! Actually if someone used a line like that I might toss my drink on him. But loved it in your piece.

  24. I love the accent. although I have a feeling that it’s gonna keep ringing in my head!

  25. hehe i enjoyed this- brought a smile to my face and for that i thank you immensely.

  26. Perfectly silly! I love it!

  27. MaryD on said:

    With lines like that, she isn’t the first one to thwart his dreams. I am picturing him with a raw & bulbous nose.

    Came over from the Trifecta blog. I read it, just don’t participate.

  28. ha ha ha I don’t blame her for avoiding him like the plague. 🙂

  29. I Wish you Happy first day of spring!

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