My truth. My life.

Becoming Her

Have you ever woken up one day and realize that everything you thought and felt growing up has changed?  Have you ever asked yourself this question?  When did it happen? When did I change?  When did I become her (or him)?  I’m talking about, When did I become my mom?

I am going to go back a littlebit to explain what I mean.  When I was a child my mom was aweful… She was the type of mom that made me do the stupidest things..  She made life hard on a kid… I mean, how dare she make me eat those yucky veggies, brush my teeth, do my homework..  The worst of things was when she made me clean my room.  She was a monster! 
I remember when I would come home with a bad grade, talk back to her or just not do what I was told, she would ground me. Why would anyone do that to their child. She obviously didn’t love me.  Did I mention how stupid she was? She didnt understand anything I was going through.  If she did she would have let me do what I wanted to do!  My sister was her favorite.  She was the perfect kid.. Mom gave her EVERYTHING… Why did she bother having me, she should have just has April first…  (April, you are not allowed to comment on this part).   When I have kids, I will show her how to be a parent.  I will do things differently.  I’ll show her…

Fast Forward:

Now, I am a mom of 3.  I first noticed the change about 3 years ago.  It was a small thing really.  Taylor (age 13) came up to me and asked if she could walk around the mall with her friends. I said no.. I didnt even have to think about it.  This conversation became a big ordeal.  There was screaming. Then it happened:   

Tay: (yelling) “My friends parents let them do it”
Me: (yelling)  “I’m not your friends mother”  

I stopped immediatly after saying this and went to my room.  I caught my breathe and whispered to myself. Lord, Please don’t make me start to think that she might be right.  My mom just cant be right.  Several things have happened since then that have been just as bad.  I make my kids eat their veggies, brush their teeth and do their homework.  And yes, I even make them clean their room.  I have been known to say “Because I said so”.  When Tay responded that because is not an answer, I calmly explained to her that “I am the mom, and since I make the rules, because is all of the answer she needs.

So Mom, now, I am the stupid one. You really did know (almost) everything. I however, know nothing..  If you dont believe me just ask Tay…


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5 thoughts on “Becoming Her

  1. I remember that mall argument. I was so proud of you. Mimi gave you a very good example. You have become her and I have become my dad. Good blog, Bobina

  2. At one point in my mothering, I even responded to the umpteenth 'but why can't I' with 'because in this house, I. AM. GOD. and I said no.'I have also called my own mother several times and apologized for whatever I did to bring on the karma-storm that is my kids.

  3. Amen to you both. As I get older, my father gets smarter and smarter.

  4. As soon as I got this blog posted yesterday Taylor informed me that I can not possibly understand what she goes through… Haha.. If she only knew.

  5. smiling – from a Gramma's perspective – just smiling. 🙂 <— added for good benefit. My daughters have called me several times – to apologize AND to complain that I was right after all. We have become our parents. 🙂

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